Sometimes I have an anger problem. With certain people (insert husband’s name here), I have a tendency to click immediately into righteous indignation if I feel slighted or misunderstood. Having been raised with four brothers, I learned early on to defend myself by coming out swinging. Clearly, I have matured out of that approach (within the last couple of years at least) but often fire flashes from my eyes and epithets issue forth from my mouth.
Except for today.
Today, I asked myself, “What is something peaceful you could think about instead?”
My mind instantly went to a visual of the red-tailed hawks that soar through the sky at the orange grove. I simply pictured two red-tailed hawks gliding on the air currents in the bright blue sky. I could see the red on their tail feathers and imagine what it felt like to be bolstered by the wind. Any time I felt my mind wondering, I gently returned to that picture of the red-tailed hawks. Soon, I felt myself calming, and before long, I was anger-free. It worked almost like magic.
While I may be the only one around who gets annoyed fairly easily by his/her beloved spouse (or friend, relative, or crazy driver), I suspect there are one or two people out there who can benefit from coming up with their own version of a calming image to visualize. If you happen to be one of those few, I can attest (at least this once) to the effectiveness of this method.
I’ll update you if it works twice.
I too am prone to quick anger or resentment. Living dependent in some ways on offspring doesn’t help my impatience. These days I am also impatient with what I consider immoral political views, etc. I have an image from childhood that comforts me–I am about 12, sitting on a low dune overlooking Lake Michigan, listening to it roar, seeing the sun glisten on it, watching the whitecaps, my arm around the collie mix Timmy that I grew up with (Timmy was a bitch, not sure how she got that masculine name.)
Aw. Love that image. Glad I’m not the only one! Hugs to you, my friend.